take-aways

• The private notes of the greatest emperor ever lived. Meditations holds the daily reflections of the Roman emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Inside these pages, you can sense the soul of this great man. Understand how he viewed death. How he approached adversity. Treated the people around him. And most importantly, what gave him the strength to continue.

• You have only now. Live in the present moment and use your time wisely.

• Other people are outside of your control. The best you can do is to show them. Let your deeds do the talking.

• If something bad happens, dig to find the gains. Don’t cling on the negative side of things.

• Above all, you need to be a reasonable person. To live in harmony with nature and to make sure that you are the same person both in difficult times and in good times. When hardship enters the scene, as it will inevitably happen, to face it and act nobly.

• Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.

• You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.

• Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.

• It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.

• Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present

• ““I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures. Simple in actions and in thoughts, you return to the source of being. Patient with both friends and enemies, you accord with the way things are. Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all beings in the world.””

• In the book, Marcus Aurelius teaches us how to become just, righteous, reasonable human beings who get up every day with a desire to make the world a better place.

• One of his struggles, after reading this short book, I believe, is the lack of people who shared his world views. That’s probably one of the reasons he kept writing in his diary. To find clarity. To remain sane while surrounded by injustice and illogical people.

• The ultimate lesson in the book is the following: Happiness is a byproduct of thinking and acting in ways that are just, generous, resolute, purposeful, and free of a desire for lust and more physical things. If you find meaningful tasks in your life and abstract yourself from things that are outside of your power, you’ll live a healthy and aspiring life.

• The most important lesson to take away from Meditations is that our minds have great power. We can choose how we perceive events and we can always choose to be virtuous. If we practice, we can instantly erase any bad impressions from our mind. We are completely in control of our thoughts and actions. Remember the two quotes: “You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”

• People will always do awful (or at least unpleasant) things and we are only responsible our own virtue. We can choose to be good even when we are surrounded by wrong. When another harms us, we can react with kindness, advising them of their errors if possible but being okay with it if they ignore this advice. When another angers us, we must immediately consider their point of view, remember that we have our own faults, and respond with positivity and indifference to any supposed harm done to us.

• The deepest lesson in Meditations relates to our mortality and the shortness of life. We shall soon be replaced, and we ought not waste our lives being distressed. We should focus on doing good for the others with the unknowable amount of time we have left to live. To make this a part of our lives we must reflect regularly on the fact that we will die. This can result in some of the deepest understandings available to humans, therefore death should be confronted no matter how unpleasant it may be to think about. We should reflect on all the people that have come before us, what is left of them now, and what will later be left of us.

THE ART OF SELF-REFLECTION

• SELF-REFLECTION IN MARCUS AURELIUS’ MEDITATIONS

  • At the core of Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations is the practice of self-reflection, an ongoing dialogue with his innermost thoughts and emotions. By engaging in this introspective journey, the Roman Emperor sought to better understand himself and, by extension, how he could develop himself. After all, it’s difficult to grow if we don’t know what we’re working with.
  • His writings reveal a profound awareness of his own character, as well as a commitment to personal growth and self-improvement.
  • Through the lens of self-reflection, Marcus Aurelius confronts the complexities of human nature and his individual nature, examining the motivations, fears, and desires that drive our thoughts and actions.

• INCORPORATING SELF-REFLECTION IN OUR DAILY LIVES

  • Here are a few strategies for weaving this timeless art into our own daily routines:
    • Set aside time: Firstly we must dedicate a specific time each day for self-reflection, whether it be in the morning with a cup of tea, during a lunchtime walk, or in the evening as you unwind from the day’s activities. By establishing a consistent routine, we create a sacred space for introspection and growth.
    • Keep a journal: Just as Marcus Aurelius recorded his thoughts in the Meditations, consider keeping a journal to capture your own reflections. This practice not only helps to crystallize our ideas but also serves as a tangible reminder of our personal development over time.
    • Engage in mindful meditation: Mindfulness meditation can be a powerful catalyst for self-reflection, as it encourages us to observe our thoughts and emotions without judgment. By cultivating a heightened sense of self-awareness, we become better equipped to navigate the inner landscape of our minds.
    • Seek solitude: In our hyperconnected world, it can be difficult to find moments of quiet and solitude. However, it is in these moments of stillness that we can truly engage with our inner selves. Carve out time for solitude, whether it be through a walk in nature, a quiet corner at home, or even a brief respite during the workday.
  • “At some point you have to recognize what world it is that you belong to; what power rules it and from what source you spring; that there is a limit to the time assigned you, and if you don’t use it to free yourself it will be gone and will never return.”
  • “Concentrate every minute like a Roman—like a man—on doing what’s in front of you with precise and genuine seriousness, tenderly, willingly, with justice. And on freeing yourself from all other distractions. Yes, you can—if you do everything as if it were the last thing you were doing in your life, and stop being aimless, stop letting your emotions override what your mind tells you, stop being hypocritical, self-centered, irritable.”
  • “People who labor all their lives but have no purpose to direct every thought and impulse toward are wasting their time—even when hard at work.”

EMBRACING THE DICHOTOMY OF CONTROL

• UNDERSTANDING WHAT IS WITHIN OUR CONTROL AND WHAT IS NOT

  • In his Meditations, Marcus Aurelius repeatedly emphasizes the importance of recognizing the limits of our control. He teaches us that while we cannot dictate the external circumstances of our lives, we possess the power to shape our inner responses to those circumstances.
  • Through learning to focus our energy on what we can control – our thoughts, emotions, and actions – we liberate ourselves from the shackles of worry and anxiety that so often accompany our futile attempts to control the uncontrollable.
  • This dichotomy of control serves as a cornerstone of Stoic philosophy, guiding us towards a life of greater tranquility and self-mastery.
  • ‘Those who understand others are intelligent. / Those who understand themselves are enlightened.’

• PRACTICAL APPLICATIONS OF THE DICHOTOMY OF CONTROL IN MODERN LIFE

  • Marcus Aurelius and his teachings give us a practice we can use to transform our approach to the challenges we face, nurturing a sense of empowerment and serenity. Here are a few practical applications of the dichotomy of control to consider:
    • Responding to adversity: When faced with setbacks or obstacles, focus on the aspects that you can control, such as your attitude, effort, and response. By doing so, you can transform adversity into an opportunity for growth and learning.
    • Managing relationships: In our interactions with others, we often encounter situations that test our patience and ability to exercise compassion. By recognizing that we cannot control the actions or emotions of others, we free ourselves to focus on our own responses, fostering greater empathy and compassion.
    • Navigating uncertainty: In times of uncertainty or change, it can be tempting to cling to the illusion of control, finding comfort in the lie. However, by acknowledging the limits of our power, we can cultivate a sense of adaptability and resilience, allowing us to navigate the unknown with grace and equanimity.
    • Cultivating emotional well-being: Embrace the knowledge that your emotional well-being lies within your control. When accept full responsibility for our wellbeing and cultivate positive thoughts and habits, we can create a more balanced and fulfilling emotional landscape.

• To Change Your Experience, Change Your Opinion

  • There are no good or bad events. There are good or bad ways we frame what happens to us. It’s always you who is defining the events. You make them good or bad, delightful or awful.
  • There’s always a positive side. If you no longer have your cool job, you can find another one – a much better one. Start your own business. Focus on the things you always wanted. Take some time off to find yourself and your meaning. And most importantly, learn from the experience – no matter how awful and dreadful it seems.
  • Even if there seemingly isn’t a positive thing to be found in something that just happened – say, decease of a relative. Stoics don’t focus on such matters. On events that cannot be undone. They center their attention on their opinion.
  • “If your opinions cause you distress, change your opinions,” is mentioned a lot in the book.
  • If something bad occurs, find the positive side to tune your mind. That’s the only way you can keep going and keep your sanity.
  • Pride goes before fall, thus ‘If one wishes to shrink it / one must first expand it.’ Likewise, you reap what you sow in life: ‘If one wishes to seize it / one must first give it’.

• You Have Three Responsibilities In LIfe

  • While we push hard to gain more friends and more followers online, we often forget to nurture the relationships that truly matter in life. And I’m not talking about our real friends and family members (though these too matter), I’m talking about the relationship we have with our body, the universe in general, and with other human beings as a whole.
  • Marcus Aurelius points out that we have three responsibilities in life, based on the three relationships above, that are of major importance:
    • To be a reasonable person.
      • By default, our first response to everything is emotional. Someone just cut you off? You get angry. Your favorite show was canceled? You start crying. If you learn to pause your sensations and act with reason you’ll become a much better decision-maker.
    • To accept what happens to you.
      • Amor fati: This is a principle confessed by all Stoics. In translation, amor fati means “love of fate.” Or in other words, to accept what happens to you no matter how difficult or horrifying. A true master can turn painful, humiliating events, into a beautiful piece of art.
    • To be generous to others.
      • Generosity to others: Part of your stay here is to help others thrive. Aid them in their journey but expect nothing in return. The act of help is its own reward.

• “I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures. Simple in actions and in thoughts, you return to the source of being. Patient with both friends and enemies, you accord with the way things are. Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all beings in the world.”

• Three treasures of the Tao: compassion, frugality, not daring to think yourself ahead in the world. Each in their turn give access to true courage, the ability to reach far and wide and the ability to be a true leader.

• Judo and Aikido are based on the words in this chapter. ‘I dare not advance an inch, but prefer to withdraw a foot.’

CULTIVATING INNER RESILIENCE AND ADAPTABILITY

• DEVELOPING INNER STRENGTH AND FLEXIBILITY

  • When we develop an understanding of our own capacity for inner strength and accept that the nature of the world around us is to change, we become better equipped to navigate the flow of life, even when we don’t like what comes our way.
  • Aurelius also highlights the importance of being flexible in our thoughts and actions, encouraging us to adapt our perspectives in response to changing conditions.
  • This means cultivating an open and adaptable mindset. In doing so, we free ourselves from the constraints of rigid thinking and the suffering that comes from being unable to accept a change in our circumstances

• BUILDING RESILIENCE AND ADAPTABILITY IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY

  • Looking into the writings of Marcus Aurelius, we can see that there are trends in how he perceives adversity. From these trends we can find the following lessons:
    • Embrace change: Change is an inherent part of the human experience, and by embracing it rather than resisting it, we can develop a greater sense of adaptability. Recognize that every change, whether positive or negative, offers an opportunity for growth and learning.
    • Practice self-reflection: As we have discussed in previous sections, self-reflection is a powerful tool for personal growth. By engaging in regular introspection, we can identify areas of strength and weakness, and develop strategies for cultivating greater resilience and flexibility.
    • Cultivate gratitude: Gratitude is a potent antidote to adversity, as it helps us to focus on the positive aspects of our lives, even in the face of hardship. Make a conscious effort to practice gratitude on a daily basis, and witness the transformative effect it can have on your outlook and resilience.
    • Seek out challenges: By actively seeking out challenges and embracing the discomfort they bring, we strengthen our capacity for resilience and adaptability. View each challenge as an opportunity to learn and grow, and you will find that your inner strength blossoms in response.
    • Develop a growth mindset: A growth mindset, as opposed to a fixed mindset, involves viewing challenges and setbacks as opportunities for personal development. By adopting this perspective, we cultivate a greater sense of resilience and adaptability, as we view adversity as a catalyst for growth rather than a source of defeat.

• Transform Obstacles Into Opportunities

  • Worthy things don’t come easy. There’s always some barrier preventing you from getting what you want. Especially if the item you wish to obtain promises more happiness, money, stability, or status. That’s why there aren’t a lot of rich, physically fit, or mentally stable people – we all have our limits and most of us give up when we continuously face bumps on our road.
  • But there is another way to look at things. Instead of considering the obstacles we daily face as wretched, we can see them as stepping stones for our progression as people.
  • Marcus Aurelius advises: “Is there an obstacle blocking your way? Make it part of your plan and turn it to your advantage.”
  • Think of it like that: If a task is easily achievable, it’s not worth doing. If there are mountains of challenges ahead, you’re on the right path.
  • Anticipate hardship. Desire suffering. That’s the only way you can “leave this world contentedly.”

• MAKING USE OF SOLITUDE

  • “Ordinary men hate solitude. But the Master makes use of it, embracing his aloneness, realizing he is one with the whole universe.”
  • “But first, you have to practice stillness. Stillness is the first requirement of manifesting your desires, because in stillness lies your connection to the field of pure potentiality that can orchestrate an infinity of details for you.”
  • So… How’s your stillness workin’ for you? You hate it or embrace it? Can you turn off the TV or the talk radio or the Internet (+ the cell phone and iPod and …) and immerse yourself in some

sacred silence today? (and tomorrow and… :)

• “Most of what we say and do is not essential. If you can eliminate it, you’ll have more time, and more tranquillity. Ask yourself at every moment, ‘Is this necessary?’”
• “Pain is neither unbearable nor unending, as long as you keep in mind its limits and don’t magnify them in your imagination.”
• “Everything that happens is either endurable or not. If it’s endurable, then endure it. Stop complaining. If it’s unendurable … then stop complaining. Your destruction will mean its end as well. Just remember: you can endure anything your mind can make endurable, by treating it as in your interest to do so. In your interest, or in your nature.”

THE PURSUIT OF WISDOM AND VIRTUE

• THE IMPORTANCE OF WISDOM AND VIRTUE

  • In the Meditations, Marcus Aurelius places a great deal of emphasis on the pursuit of wisdom and virtue as the ultimate goals of human life. Many of the Stoics viewed virtue as the only good and believed that to live a good and happy life, virtue must be at the top of the list of priorities.

  • Aurelius seemed to believe that these qualities were the keys to unlocking not only happiness but also effectiveness as a ruler. Wisdom, in the Stoic sense, refers to the deep understanding of the natural order of the universe and our place within it, while virtue encompasses the ethical principles that guide our thoughts, words, and deeds (the four cardinal virtues being wisdom, justice, temperance, and courage)

  • For Marcus Aurelius, the pursuit of wisdom and virtue is not a mere intellectual exercise but a lifelong endeavor that should permeate every aspect of our lives. When we adopt these things into our day-to-day existence, we align ourselves with the highest ideals of Stoic philosophy and get closer to what the Stoics called eudaimonia or flourishing.

• PRACTICAL STEPS FOR ADOPTING WISDOM AND VIRTUE

  • So, what practical steps can we take to help embody wisdom and virtue in our modern lives?
    • Seek knowledge and understanding: Actively pursue opportunities for learning and growth, whether through reading, engaging in thoughtful conversations, or exploring new experiences. By broadening our intellectual horizons, we foster the development of wisdom and a deeper understanding of the world around us. When we do this and make an effort to be more objective we also develop the ability to see the world how it it, rather than project our judgements and biases onto it.
    • Reflect on moral principles: Contemplate the ethical values that guide your life and consider how they align with the tenets of Stoic philosophy. By cultivating a strong moral compass, we pave the way for a life rooted in virtue and integrity.
    • Practice empathy and compassion: Embodying virtue also involves cultivating a deep sense of empathy and compassion for others. Strive to understand the perspectives and emotions of those around you, and respond to their needs with kindness and understanding.
    • Embrace self-discipline: Wisdom and virtue are not passive qualities; they require a commitment to self-discipline and perseverance. Cultivate habits that promote temperance, such as regular self-reflection, mindfulness, and the pursuit of meaningful goals.

• Actionable Notes:

  • Expect less: Especially from others. Aurelius writes: “If you expect an ignorant person to act like a knowledgeable one, that’s your mistake.” Do everything in your power to teach the people around you but don’t assume wonders. At the end of the day, you control only yourself.
  • Your mind is in control: If you take away all of your possessions, the fancy toys you so vividly aspire, the people around you, you’re left with a body composed of flesh and bones. But these things are nothing without the brain. Your arms and legs are obedient to your mind. Therefore, the main objective should be to direct your thoughts towards something worthy. This way the rest of the body will follow.
  • Manage your opinion: Along the way, distressful things will occur. If you act as you’re the victim, you won’t do much to make progress. You’ll feel pain but won’t do anything to change it. In this case, your thoughts are causing you pain. Fortunately, you can easily correct this. How? By changing your opinion. By re-framing the events happening in your head. The moment you switch from “I”m the victim” to “I can do something about this,” the sooner you’ll feel better.
  • Focus on improving yourself: The only thing you can control in life is yourself – your own body and mind. There’s no point in trying to convince others of your rightfulness. So, essentially, your main duty should be to get better at what you do. Get better in your work and as a person. That’s the best way you can spend your time.
  • Become independent: The more you rely on other people and on tools to do your work, the more dependent you’ll become. Swordsman in the past were easy prey when they lost their swords. Wrestlers, on the other hand, are people who count only on their fists to beat the opponent. Aspire to become a wrestler – an independent person who relies only on his own capabilities.
  • the only true expression of the Tao is that which is lived, not that which is written about or discussed.
  • ‘The highest rulers, people do not know they have them’. When in a leadership position, there are some means of leadership that are better than others. The best is for the people to believe they did it all themselves, the worst is to fear who leads them. Act quietly and subtly to the benefit of those you lead.
  • There are great pitfalls to knowledge. Too much of it, or an obsession with gaining more of it, can hold us back and frustrate us at every turn. It is not enough to grow your knowledge and keep your nose stuck in your books, you have to live your life and get wise that way also.
  • “For every action, ask: How does it affect me? Could I change my mind about it?”

• MONEY AND HAPPINESS

  • “Fame or integrity: which is more important? Money or happiness: which is more valuable? Success or failure: which is more destructive? If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never truly be fulfilled. If your happiness depends on money, you will never be happy with yourself. Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.”
  • The How of Happiness (see Notes), Sonja Lyubomirsky tells us that while 50% of our happiness levels are influenced by our genetics and 40% are under our direct control (via thoughts and behaviors), only 10% is attributed to stuff like money, cars, houses, etc.
  • “What makes up this 40 percent? Besides our genes and the situations that we confront, there is one critical thing left: our behavior. Thus the key to happiness lies not in changing our genetic makeup (which is impossible) and not in changing our circumstances (i.e., seeking wealth or attractiveness or better colleagues, which is usually impractical), but in our daily intentional activities. With this in mind, our pie chart illustrates the potential of the 40 percent that is within our ability to control, the 40 percent for room to maneuver, for opportunities to increase or decrease our happiness levels through what we do in our daily lives and how we think.”
  • A focus on material wealth will fill the heart with anguish and desire to be more, to want more. Do not show wealth to others, or even yourself.
  • ‘The sages care for the stomach and not the eyes’; constantly striving for greater distraction and speed and wealth can leave us senseless and overloaded. Instead, take care of the simple things in life.

• THE MASTER HOLDS NOTHING BACK

  • “The Master gives himself up to whatever the moment brings. He knows that he is going to die, and he has nothing left to hold on to: no illusions in his mind, no resistances in his body. He doesn’t think about his actions; they flow from the core of his being. He holds nothing back from life; therefore he is ready for death, as a man is ready for sleep after a good day’s work.”
  • Beautiful. Reminds me of Marcus Aurelius’ wisdom from his classic Meditations (see Notes). He advises us: “Take it that you have died today, and your life’s story is ended; and henceforward regard what future time may be given you as an uncovenanted surplus, and live it out in harmony with nature.”
  • “Were you to live three thousand years, or even thirty thousand, remember that the sole life which a man can lose is that which he is living at the moment; and furthermore, that he can have no other life except the one he loses… This means that the longest life and the shortest amount to the same thing. For the passing minute is every man’s equal possession, but what has once gone by is not ours.”
  • “Every day, therefore, should be regulated as if it were the one that brings up the rear, the one that rounds out and completes our lives.”

• THE SHADOW THAT HE HIMSELF CASTS

  • “A great nation is like a great man: When he makes a mistake, he realizes it. Having realized it, he admits it. Having admitted it, he corrects it. He considers those who point out his faults as his most benevolent teachers. He thinks of his enemy as the shadow that he himself casts.”
  • Circumstances arise and hard times come so that we may grow through them, so that we may evolve. I like to say that a bad day for the ego is a good day for the soul. When we look back on

some of our most challenging experiences, we admit that we wouldn’t trade what we gained from them for remaining the same as we were. Something within acknowledges that during those times when we are pressed against the ropes of life, we learn to become more generous, to forgive, to never give up on ourselves or others. We learn to regenerate, to rejuvenate, to surrender.”

• The idea that we “project our shadow” on others and are triggered by our own disowned attributes showing up in others is a huge idea.

• “Difficult and unpleasant as it may be to accept, we often feel most hostile to those who remind us of aspects of ourselves that we prefer not to see. ‘Ask someone to give a description of the personality type which he finds most despicable, most unbearable and hateful, and most impossible to get along with,’ writes Edward Whitmont, ‘and he will produce a description of his own repressed characteristics… These very qualities are so unacceptable to him precisely because they represent his own repressed side; only that which we cannot accept within ourselves do we find impossible to live with in others.’ Think for a moment of someone you actively dislike. What quality in that person do you find most objectionable? Now ask yourself, ‘How am I that?’”

• “Never regard something as doing you good if it makes you betray a trust, or lose your sense of shame, or makes you show hatred, suspicion, ill will, or hypocrisy, or a desire for things best done behind closed doors.”

• COMPETE? NAH, LET’S PLAYFULLY CREATE!

  • “The best athlete wants his opponent at his best. The best general enters the mind of his enemy.
  • The best businessman serves the communal good. The best leader follows the will of the people. All of them embody the virtue of non-competition. Not that they don’t love to compete, but they do it in the spirit of play. In this they are like children and in harmony with the Tao.”
  • “You are to become a creator, not a competitor; you are going to get what you want, but in such a way that when you get it every other man will have more than he has now.”
  • How ‘bout you? Are you finding yourself overly concerned with striving against peeps? Can you focus more on being a creator fully expressing yourself and giving your gifts to the world in the spirit of play?
  • Force and violence beget more of the same. If it must be used, never further than is absolutely necessary. Ideally not at all, ideally never. Instead work with courtesy and calm, consensus and teamwork.

NURTURING COMPASSION AND EMPATHY

• COMPASSION AND EMPATHY TOWARDS OTHERS

  • Throughout the Meditations, Marcus Aurelius demonstrates a capacity for compassion and empathy, emphasizing their importance in fostering a sense of connectedness and understanding with others.
  • He encourages us to see beyond our own perspectives and to recognize the shared humanity that unites us all, urging us to embrace the role of “citizens of the world” and to act in the best interests of the collective.
  • He reminds us that we are all on this journey of life together and that by extending our compassion and empathy to others, we contribute to the greater good and enrich our own lives in the process.
  • Comparison, approval, fear of disgrace… all bad habits that centre around the ego. If we let go of them and learn to love ourselves in equal measure with how we love the world then we are more likely to make our way more peacefully through life.

• STRATEGIES FOR ENHANCING OUR CONNECTIONS WITH OTHERS

  • The following strategies can help you nurture compassion and empathy in your daily life, enhancing your connections with others:
    • Practice active listening: Engage fully in conversations, listening attentively to the thoughts and feelings of others without judgment or interruption.
    • Cultivate self-awareness: By becoming more aware of our own emotions, we are better equipped to empathize with the emotions of others. Practice self-reflection and mindfulness to develop a deeper understanding of your emotional landscape, and use this knowledge to strengthen your empathy towards others.
    • Seek to understand before being understood: In our interactions with others, strive to understand their perspectives, emotions, and experiences before attempting to communicate your own.
    • Embrace vulnerability: By allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and open with others, we create an environment in which empathy and compassion can flourish. Share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with others, and encourage them to do the same, fostering a sense of trust and shared humanity.
    • Practice loving-kindness meditation: This form of meditation, rooted in Buddhist tradition, involves focusing on cultivating feelings of love and compassion towards oneself and others. By practicing loving-kindness meditation, you can enhance your capacity for empathy and compassion, enriching your connections with those around you.

ACCEPTING IMPERMANENCE AND CHANGE

• THE ROLE OF IMPERMANENCE AND CHANGE

  • In his Meditations, Marcus Aurelius contemplates the ceaseless dance of change and impermanence, urging us to recognize and accept the transient nature of our existence. He teaches that our lives, like the seasons of the year, are in a constant state of flux, subject to the ebb and flow of fortune and circumstance. Through the acknowledgement of the inevitability of change, we liberate ourselves from the fruitless pursuit of permanence and awaken to the beauty and richness of life’s unfolding story.
  • Aurelius also encourages us to view impermanence as a catalyst for growth and transformation, recognizing that change brings with it the opportunity for renewal, evolution, and the need for adaptability.
  • When we understand that the nature of the universe is change and we embrace that nature, we bring ourselves closer to wisdom and become more resilient to the negative impact of changing circumstances.

• TECHNIQUES FOR EMBRACING IMPERMANENCE AND FINDING PEACE

  • Here are a few pointers to help you develop this perspective on change in your own life:
    • Practice mindfulness: Develop awareness of the present moment, recognizing that each experience, thought, and emotion is fleeting and will eventually give way to something new.
    • Reflect on the transient nature of all things: Contemplate the impermanence of life and its manifestations, from the changing seasons to the cycles of birth and death. This reflection can help you develop a greater appreciation for the beauty and fragility of existence, fostering a sense of peace and acceptance.
    • Cultivate non-attachment: Release your attachment to outcomes, possessions, and relationships, recognizing that all things are subject to change and impermanence. By embracing non-attachment, we free ourselves from the suffering that arises from clinging to the transient and allow ourselves to experience life with greater ease and grace.
    • Focus on the process, not the outcome: In your endeavors, strive to appreciate and enjoy the journey, rather than becoming fixated on the end result. Through focusing on the process, you cultivate an attitude of openness and flexibility, allowing you to adapt and thrive in the face of change and uncertainty.
    • Foster gratitude for the present moment: Practice gratitude for the present moment and all that it offers, recognizing that each experience is a unique and transient gift. Cultivating gratitude helps to anchor us in the present, allowing us to embrace the impermanence of life with a sense of appreciation and wonder.

• Accept People As They Are

  • When we look at others, we imagine that they hold the same principles, ambitions, and intentions as we do. But when you come to think about it, you’ll easily spot how this claim is decisive.
  • Marcus Aurelius reported the same thing in his daily journaling. He wrote the following:
    • Begin each morning by saying to yourself: Today I will meet people who are noisy, ungrateful, arrogant, deceitful, envious, and unsocial. They can’t help it—they are ignorant of the difference between good and bad.”
    • “How is this helping me,” you might think?
    • Well, firstly, it will lower your bar. You’ll stop expecting wonders from others. Secondly, it will help you stay calm when you face self-absorbed characters.
  • As a person who’s guided by reason, you should know that there are others who don’t know the stuff you do. People who don’t have ambitions, goals, and simply live to see how others fail. Such folks are ignorant of their ignorance.
  • Hence, your task in life when you’re interacting with such conflicting characters, is to remain calm. Don’t try so hard to reason them. Convey your message using words but don’t expect grand results. And above all, don’t take it personally when they speak of you.
  • Troubles and pain are caused by a discrepancy between wanting things to be a certain way and accepting them as they are. ‘Knowing constancy’ and the true nature of how the world works is to know yourself and to know/understand the responsibility you have to guide your life with these things in mind.

• All You Have Is The Present Moment

  • Imagine what it was to live 2000 years ago – no fresh water, zero security, lack of food, continuous wars. People were surely daydreaming, hoping, for something good to happen. After all, how would anyone prevail the daily challenges if there wasn’t some sort of promise for a better future?
  • Yet, apart from instilling hope, hoping for a better future gives you a false sense of joy and accomplishment. What you really have is now, this present moment. Nothing else.
  • That’s what Marcus Aurelius persistently noted in his journal. He realized that moaning about the past and imagining a future where things are different, better, is just a waste of time. What we really have is the present moment. We neither hold yesterday nor have access to tomorrow. We have only now.
  • If you fail to harness the present moment and make your daily deeds worthy, it’s irrelevant of how many years you’ve stayed on this planet. Even if you live for thousands of years, you wasted all of them if you spend your time daydreaming or doing petty tasks.
  • “You cannot lose another life than the one you’re living now, or live another one than the one you’re losing.”

• ALL THINGS CHANGE

  • “If you realize that all things change, there is nothing you will try to hold on to.”
  • “No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.”
  • “The origin of the word change is the Old English cambium, which means “to become.”
  • Be like water. The nature of water is to flow into the lowest place and find its level. Being like this we respond in truth, we act with kindness to all, we move and change with the world as it changes around us without fighting it.

Quotes

“I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures. Simple in actions and in thoughts, you return to the source of being. Patient with both friends and enemies, you accord with the way things are. Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all beings in the world.” ~ Lao Tzu from Tao te Ching

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.” ~ Lao Tzu

If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.

This present moment is all the life we ever have. The longest life and the shortest converge on this same point. No matter how many years stretch behind or in front of us, the present moment remains the same.” Marcus Aurelius

Like a horse after running a race, or a bee after making honey, a good person doesn’t stop and look around for applause or rewards. They go on to produce another good deed, as a vine produces more grapes in season.” Marcus Aurelius

Am I unhappy because of what happened to me? No. I remain happy because, regardless of circumstances, I am free—neither crushed by the present nor afraid of the future.” Marcus Aurelius

“Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.”

“If it is not right, do not do it, if it is not true, do not say it.”

“The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting. The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”

“Concentrate every minute like a Roman—like a man—on doing what’s in front of you with precise and genuine seriousness, tenderly, willingly, with justice. And on freeing yourself from all other distractions. Yes, you can—if you do everything as if it were the last thing you were doing in your life, and stop being aimless, stop letting your emotions override what your mind tells you, stop being hypocritical, self-centered, irritable. You see how few things you have to do to live a satisfying and reverent life? If you can manage this, that’s all even the gods can ask of you.”

“We all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own.”

“Not to feel exasperated, or defeated, or despondent because your days aren’t packed with wise and moral actions. But to get back up when you fail, to celebrate behaving like a human—however imperfectly—and fully embrace the pursuit that you’ve embarked on.”

“How easy it is to repel and to wipe away every impression which is troublesome or unsuitable, and immediately to be in all tranquility.”

“You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.”

“Ambition means tying your well-being to what other people say or do… Sanity means tying it to your own actions.”

“Discard your misperceptions. Stop being jerked like a puppet. Limit yourself to the present.”

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive-to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”

“You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.

“Loss is nothing else but change, and change is Nature’s delight.”

References

• https://orionphilosophy.com/marcus-aurelius-meditations-the-power-of-stoic-reflection/
• https://durmonski.com/book-summaries/meditations/#8-lesson-5-you-have-three-responsibilities-in-life
• https://www.samuelthomasdavies.com/book-summaries/philosophy/meditations/
• https://drive.google.com/file/d/1EBtaXIHpA7-NutGmETudU0fafDHa2-d3/view
• https://www.willpatrick.co.uk/notes/tao-te-ching-lao-tzu-derek-lin
• https://dailystoic.com/meditations-marcus-aurelius/